Rambling IV September 16, 2005

Liz Phair T-shirt
Imagine this in black and grey...I don't care if it is gay, I love it.
This is a true story: So I have this Liz Phair shirt that I really like. It's a little tight but not enough for me to not wear it. So I went to this party the other day and the host, Heather, notices the shirt...
H: Liz Phair.
J: Um, yeah?
H: You like Liz Phair?
J: Uh, yeah.
H: Are you gay?
J: [puzzling look] No. Why?
H: Well doesn't she hate men?
J: No she doesn't hate men.

So after this, I comment on the interior paints in her condo (which did nothing to dispel her notion that I am gay) and about 10 minutes later, a friend I invited shows up wearing a pink polo which pretty much guaranteed her "He's gay" theory. I couldn't make this stuff up.

Uma Thurman
In real life Timothy Hutton should have taken the Slow Burn approach with Uma.
** Warning: New Lingo Alert **
Category Killer (courtesy of Rothschild): A girl that has one and only one thing going for her (e.g. "Drew Barrymore is a Category Killer. the only thing good about her is her chest.")
Slow Burn: To hit on a girl slowly, gradually over time. (e.g. "She's a bartender and gets hit-on all the time. I need to take the Slow Burn approach.")

Pet Peeve: People that hit reply to all when they are really replying to just one. My friend sent an email to twelve people saying she passed an exam. Seven people replied to all. Am I the only one that this bothers?

Sign The World Is Ending: Coldplay, Bo Bice Rule Charts (Yahoo article headline...from like 2mos ago when I originally planned to post this damn thing).

Michael Scofield
"Lookout during Sweeps Week Scofield!"
I expected two shows to break out this year: Prison Break and Reunion. Prison Break is meeting my expectations; Reunion is not. Rothschild made this comment about Prison Break: "It seems like the two main actors are trying to outbrood each other. In fact, everyone on that show is always brooding. If they have a full season of that, it's going to get old quickly." I couldn't have said it better myself. They need a 3-episode arc where everyone re-enacts The Longest Yard just to add some humor to the show. I also predict some sort of sodomy episode during sweeps.

Top Five reasons I love(d) the Summer (which is sadly ending soon):
a) baseball
b) girls in tank tops
c) flip flops and sandals
d) beer gardens
e) more daylight

I am tired of Constructive Criticism and will now only offer Destructive Criticism.

Emotional Baggage Check
"Hey did you check your emotional baggage?"
I would love to go into a bar and see a "Emotional Baggage Check" sign. People could go there, fill out a card, and leave all their baggage in that little closet and actually interact with other people without any of it hanging over them.

I have a friend named Eric Keen. Now I know a kid at work named Erik Keener. If anyone knows an Eric Keenest, introduce me, I would like to make him my friend.

Which Arrested Development character are you? Find out here. I am Tobias. TOBIAS!!! That is crap, I wanted to be GOB.

So my friend changed his MSN name to "Black Lion" in reference to Voltron. So I changed my name to "Pink Lion" and while trying to find a picture, I realized there is no pink lion. The princess is dressed in a pink suit but pilots the Blue lion. Another guy, Lance wears blue and pilots the red lion. This is fucked up. I think if they gave the princess a gender-stereotype color to wear, at least match the suit to a lion as close as possible. Stupid Voltron.

K.I.T.T.
"You don't have to yell, Michael, I'm all around you."
The 50 Coolest On-Screen Rides. Yes it's true I recently purchased a 1:18 replica of the AMC Delorean, K.I.T.T., and the General Lee. I hope to put them in a Guitar Coffee Table which I am hoping to build in the future - with the help of my friends. I am a huge nerd.

Me: In case u don’t know…girls are FUCKING INSANE!
J: Are you kidding me, they're as logical as it comes. Plus, they're level headed, and enjoy reason.

Even though Green Day's American Idiot CD is one of the best CDs to come out in the past couple years, isn't Boulevard of Broken Dreams just a rip-off of Whitesnake's Here I Go Again?


Whitesnake
"Um, guys, didn't we do that song back in '86?"
Whitesnake - Here I Go Again Green Day - Boulevard of Broken Dreams
I don’t know where I’m going
But, I sure know where I’ve been
Hanging on the promises
In songs of yesterday
An’ I’ve made up my mind,
I ain’t wasting no more time
But, here I go again
Here I go again

Tho’ I keep searching for an answer,
I never seem to find what I’m looking for
Oh lord, I pray
You give me strength to carry on,
’cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

An’ here I go again on my own
Goin’ down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An’ I’ve made up my mind
I ain’t wasting no more time

I’m just another heart in need of rescue,
Waiting on love’s sweet charity
An’ I’m gonna hold on
For the rest of my days,
’cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

An’ here I go again on my own
Goin’ down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An’ I’ve made up my mind
I ain’t wasting no more time

But, here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go...

An’ I’ve made up my mind,
I ain’t wasting no more time

An’ here I go again on my own
Goin’ down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
’cos I know what it means
To walk along the lonely street of dreams

An’ here I go again on my own
Goin’ down the only road I’ve ever known,
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone
An’ I’ve made up my mind
I ain’t wasting no more time...

But, here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go again,
Here I go,
Here I go again...
I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don't know where it goes
But it's home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
and I'm the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah,
Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I'm walking down the line
That divides me somewhere in my mind
On the border line
Of the edge and where I walk alone

Read between the lines
What's fucked up and everything's alright
Check my vital signs
To know I'm still alive and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone

Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Ah-ah, Aaah-ah
Ah-ah, Ah-ah

I walk alone
I walk a...

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
And I'm the only one and I walk a...

My shadow's the only one that walks beside me
My shallow heart's the only thing that's beating
Sometimes I wish someone out there will find me
'Til then I walk alone...

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